Tag: music

Desires of Your Heart

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I have loved music since childhood, the way it becomes part of you and expresses how you feel. Growing up, all I wanted to do was play the piano. Any thought of a career involved music, and truthfully all I ever considered besides performing, was teaching piano at the college level. I certainly never pictured myself as an elementary music teacher. Sometimes life takes a funny turn…or two…or three. 😉

After college and graduate school, Gart and I married and soon started a family. I was a stay at home mom. I played piano at church, for a high school choir, and any other opportunity that came along. I also taught lessons from our home. Although I enjoyed teaching beginners, it was that rare advanced student that really made me smile. I loved the challenge of getting them to be expressive, to really think about what they were playing.

Fast-forward nine years. We moved to Tulsa, two of our three kids were in elementary school. Our youngest wasn’t particularly happy about being home without brother and sister. It was time for a change. After a few phone calls, and an interview I was on staff at a local university as an accompanist and eventually added as an adjunct piano instructor. The perfect job!

Full-time positions were rare, but six years later one finally came along. I worked as a visiting professor for one year while going through the interview process. As far as my working life goes, this was one of my best years! I loved going to work every day. My students were challenging and the results rewarding.

I went through the interview process fully expecting to be hired as a piano professor. Although the process was stressful, I was confident. And I clung to Psalm 37:4: “Take delight in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart.” After all, this was the desire of my heart. It had been for a long time.

You may have already guessed-I did not get the job. I was devastated. Many tears were shed and questions asked, but not many answers given. I continued working as an adjunct instructor the following year, despite the awkwardness, not wanting to give up my students.

I also did some accompanying at a local middle school for one of my former college students. That’s where I met Jeffrey. Jeffrey was a student with special needs who was in the middle school choir. We had an immediate connection, and I looked forward to visiting with him each class.

Once again I began sensing that need for a change. My husband suggested I apply to be a paraprofessional at the local school. His previous suggestions of this had been ignored, but not this time. My friendship with Jeffrey fueled the decision.

I applied and was hired for the following school year. After several months, I knew I wanted my own classroom. This was not logical. A pianist with two college degrees in music now had the desire to be a special education teacher? With my husband’s research and help, I was completely certified by mid-summer after my first year as a paraprofessional. Even more amazing, I was hired to teach for the upcoming school year.

The realization I’d actually been given the desires of my heart only came after my career change. I had worked as a college professor, even if only for one year. And it was a great year! The truly amazing thing is He gave my heart a new desire and then opened the doors for it to be fulfilled.

That probably sounds like the end of the story, right? It was only the beginning, as I am currently in my 5th year as an elementary music teacher (the one thing I never thought I’d be) in the same building where I taught special education. And I’m certain there are more changes to come. Who knows what is next?

Lessons I have learned through this adventure-sometimes the desires of your heart are granted in ways you never considered. Other times, your heart is given new desires. Either way, there is a plan and a purpose. As long as you are willing to trust and take a step in a new direction. Even when that step takes you where you never thought you’d go.

A Calvin-n-Hobbes t-shirt & James Taylor

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My first memories of listening to music on my own involved carrying around my Bicentennial ’76 transistor radio. There were no headphones. I just walked around the yard holding this little treasure up to my ear. I’m certain I heard James Taylor’s “You’ve Got a Friend” and “How Sweet it is” many times on that tiny device.

My first memories of actually playing James Taylor songs came from a pink songbook entitled, “Contemporary Sounds of Music of Today.” “Fire and Rain” & “Country Road” graced this collection, and quickly became two of my favorites. I would play them on piano and quite often an aunt or cousin would be standing behind me singing along.

Fast forward through high school. Although I heard some of JT’s new releases, I was busy working on my bachelor and master’s degrees in music. Much of my time was spent in a practice room or rehearsing with other musicians. Very little time was left to simply listen to music for pleasure.

But there were moments…a concert in Fayetteville, AR during grad school comes to mind. Here I heard “Your Smiling Face” live for the first time. This was like a second beginning of my love for James Taylor’s music, and the first of many concerts I would attend.

Though it feels like a lifetime ago, there is one song, one small moment in time, which stands out above the rest. Grad school again, my future husband, Gart, and I had just met. My life was kind of a mess.

He introduced me to the song “Like Everyone She Knows” (by James Taylor, of course.) I listened to it on repeat one entire weekend while visiting my family. The more I listened, the more it seemed to be talking about me.

https://itunes.apple.com/us/album/like-everyone-she-knows/169612785?i=169613674

The more I listened, the more I realized Gart was someone special.

I often tell people Gart rescued me. He would say I’m being overly dramatic, but I would have to disagree. Somehow, he was able to see through the mess and here we are twenty-six years, three kids, and six cities later.

I’m thankful for the way he encourages me while challenging me to stretch myself. He likes to say things like, “Life is hard, life is messy, but it is also awesome and beautiful.” And if feelings of doubt or guilt creep in, he reminds me that the difficult times helped make me who I am today.

I’m thankful for the beauty of poetry and music, creating a song with the power to touch my heart. A song which somehow felt like it was written just for me. A song written by my favorite singer, James Taylor (in case you haven’t already figured that out), and introduced to me by a cute guy wearing a Calvin-n-Hobbes t-shirt who was willing to take a chance.

Merry Christmas, Gart. Thank you for continuing to rescue me. I love you!

5th Grade Words of Wisdom

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Why is it I’m so surprised when kids speak words of wisdom? Yes, sometimes it is difficult to catch amongst all the silliness and play. It seems to appear when least expected. Like today in the middle of Christmas Carol Bingo, for example.

I wanted the last few days before Winter break to be extra fun and relaxing. If I’m feeling stressed, I know my students are even more so. What could be more fun than Bingo? And when it involves Christmas carols, you can’t go wrong.

                                   Christmas Carol Bingo

My first class of the day is 5th grade. In the middle of our game, one of my students said, “Sometimes I have anxiety. There is so much to get done.” “Me, too,” I responded. “But sometimes music helps my anxiety.” This brief conversation, then the game continued.

It really was a fun class. We were singing along while we played. And of course, there are peppermints for prizes when one gets a Bingo. This first forty-five minutes of the day flew by.

Our game was over. All the marker pieces put away. Students were lining up to leave and face the remainder of their day. That’s when my friend from earlier walked over and gave me a hug. “I just wanted to say thank you, Mrs. Morris. I was having so much anxiety earlier, but now I’m not!”

Out of the mouths of babes…

Even as adults it can be difficult to deal with anxiety. First, we must recognize it, then find ways to cope. Maybe we can eventually learn to see it coming and feel prepared. But not kids. They need our help.

The funny thing is, in the process of helping my friend today, all be it unintentionally, his words actually helped me. I often talk about the power of music, the ways it can calm. I often forget, however, to utilize music when I’m feeling anxious.

These 5th-grade words of wisdom could not have come at a more appropriate time. Two days of school left before Winter break. Preparation for holidays and travel with family. Last-minute shopping. Joyful yet stressful times.

I think I’ll start working on my music playlist now. 😉

Here’s a good place to start. https://itunes.apple.com/us/album/river/571368921?i=571369254

Broken Hearts in Music Class

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“Mrs. Morris, you’re breaking my heart.” These words from a kindergarten friend during music class this past Friday.

He walked over in the middle of our Bingo game to inform me someone had spit in his eye. My investigation began, interrupting our game. By the time it was over, only a few minutes, he had confessed the entire story, including the part about him first “spanking” the alleged “eye-spitter.”

The game needed to continue. This was my first attempt at playing Bingo with kindergarten and I wanted to get to the best part! Five-in-a-row and BINGO! The prize, a piece of candy, was sure to be a hit.

My two friends involved in the conflict were not allowed to finish the game. Yes, it was sad, but there are consequences when we make poor choices. Spanking and spitting definitely fall into that category.

My two friends were definitely disappointed. The game continued, and finally we got to Bingo. I got out the candy, and their disappointment turned to devastation. Crocodile tears began to flow along with audible sobbing. And then those words, “Mrs. Morris, you’re breaking my heart.”

The proclamation was followed by a quiet comment about “just getting candy at home,” so I’m pretty sure there were not actually any broken hearts.

Oh, my goodness. So dramatic! It was difficult not to smile. Admittedly, part of me wanted to let them finish the game. In some ways, that might have been easier. Fewer tears would have been shed. But what message would that send to the other students? You can do whatever you want to your friends, and no one will hold you accountable.

When I see my friends again next week, I’m sure there will once again be smiles and hugs. All will be forgiven. And when it’s time to play Bingo again, hopefully, my friends will remember to keep their hands ( and spit) to themselves and play the game. I certainly don’t want anyone else’s heart to be broken during music class. 😉

My Red, Ceramic, Music Box Piano

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I have a small collection of miniature pianos. The very first one was a gift from my mom-a red, ceramic, upright piano with a cute little round stool. I’ve had this piano for as long as I can remember.

                                                 My little red piano

There is one more thing which makes this piano extra special. It’s a music box! A metal key on the back must be turned to begin its song. And what song does my red piano play? Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head. If I turned the piano key today, the music would play at an extremely slothful pace, making the song nearly unrecognizable.

                                            The magical key

So much joy came from turning that key when I was a kid. If I sit quietly and listen, the song still plays in my head. Fast to slow, then stopping as the mechanism winds down. The melody and the lyrics fill my thoughts, just as they did when I was a little girl.

So I just did me some talking to the sun
And I said I didn’t like the way he got things done
Sleeping on the job
Those raindrops keep falling on my head,
They keep fallin’

Funny words for a song. Childlike in nature. I can picture a little girl standing in the rain, shaking her finger towards the sky. Asking the sun why it went away. Wanting the rain to stop.

I really hadn’t given much thought to the history behind the song until now. The original singer was B.J. Thomas. I’m certain I heard his recording on the radio. What I didn’t know-it was written for the movie “Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid” and won an Academy Award. How exciting!

It’s funny. I started thinking about this song yesterday in conjunction with my red, ceramic, music box piano. And then today, it rained all day long. Actually, it’s still raining now. Which leads me to the bridge section of the song.

But there’s one thing I know
The blues they send to meet me
Won’t defeat me, it won’t be long
‘Till happiness steps up to greet me

Now that the day is ending, even though the rain is still falling, I’ll choose to look for that happiness. The happiness which comes from simple things. Simple things like the last line of this song:

Because I'm free
Nothing's worrying me

Simple things like my red, ceramic, music box piano and the precious memories it brings.

Kids, Music, and Christmas

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It’s that busy time of year. So many things to do! Concerts, parties, baking, shopping. Everyone rushing around, trying to find that perfect gift. Crazy afternoon and evening traffic backed up for miles. Making travel plans to see out-of-town family and friends. Teachers trying to survive the last few days before a much-needed winter break.

With darkness coming earlier each day, it is tempting to go home and go to sleep after work. Or at least snuggle up with a good book, blanket, and cup of hot cocoa, maybe do a little online shopping. But sometimes it is worth it to do something that will spread a little cheer.

Yesterday after school, a teacher friend and I took our choir and student council students to visit an assisted living facility. The kids delivered cards and sang carols to two different groups of residents. You can just imagine the smiles on the precious faces of the elderly patients, many who have health and/or memory issues. The smiles on the kids’ faces were almost as bright.

When I arrived at school this morning, I overheard one student asking another about her visit to the nursing home the day before. Smiling ear to ear her response, “It was great! One sweet little lady gave me a kiss on the cheek.” Oh, my goodness. This excitement from a 5th grader.

Another sweet report went something like, “There was a lady in a wheelchair who looked like she was sleeping. But as soon as the music started, she opened her eyes and started moving!” I think it’s safe to say these children were a bright spot in her day.

Yes, this outing extended our day a little. Yes, it was a little chaotic carpooling thirty-something kids from school to the center and back. Yes, there is a level of stress that goes with making sure everyone gets picked up by their parent. However, all of those were overshadowed by the smiles and thank you’s which followed us out the door and were still impacting us the next day.

The truth is that bit of cheer we spread yesterday followed us right into today. Hopefully, some of it also remained with its original recipients.  

A beautiful circle of hope thanks to kids, music, and Christmas.

More Than Just a Band Concert

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My husband and I recently attended our last winter concert as band parents. Our youngest son, a tuba player, is a senior. If not careful, my emotions can quickly take over during events like this. The powerful music, memories of concerts past and of faithfully attending family members who are no longer with us create a perfect recipe for tears.

The band program has been an integral part of our family life for many years. Great memories. So many expressions of support and encouragement. Sibling to sibling, parent to child, grandparent to grandchild-a beautiful circle of family love and support. With an added bonus of experiencing amazing music. (Not to mention the after-concert dessert. That may be the part I’ll miss the most.) 

Of course, some “mom” traditions accompany these events. Pre-concert photos, often by the Christmas tree, for starters. Due to a musical rehearsal after school, I was not home to get that picture this year. Instead, I was meeting our son for a quick dinner before the concert.

As he climbed out of his car, looking so handsome in his tuxedo, I said, “Oh no. I wish I’d thought to have Rachel take your…”. Before I could finish my sentence, he said, “It’s ok, Mom. Rachel took a picture. She knew you’d want one.” I managed not to burst into tears, so proud that my kiddos recognize the importance of these little things.


                                     Winter band concert 2018

Sitting in those performing arts center seats once again, like so many times before, I was overcome with a sense of gratitude for this experience in our kids’ lives. Involvement in these groups grounded them, gave them a place to belong, and taught them a life-long skill. Responsibility, creativity, discipline-to name a few of the strengths gained. And all of this in the setting of a public-school music program.

While listening to beautiful music, I noticed the number of students on stage. All of these individuals, capable of making a lovely sound on their own. Yet working together, their parts intertwined, created magic. And all the magic held together by an amazing teacher/director standing in front of them.

Although I know time must keep moving, and a new season is approaching, it’s difficult to imagine a school year without such events. I’m looking forward to discovering what new things we will celebrate and encourage as parents. But I will always remember our years attending concerts with joy, thankfulness, and appreciation for the power of music. Looking back with the understanding that if you look closely enough, you realize each event was much more than just a band concert.

I Almost Missed It

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Today’s first-grade music class was quite busy. We covered a lot of ground. Singing the musical alphabet reggae style, forwards and backward, along with Freddie the Frog and his friend Eli the Elephant. We also practiced writing and labeling bass clef notes on our music staff whiteboards. Oh, and I almost forgot-practicing our song for tomorrow’s Veterans Day assembly. Whew! What a whirlwind!

As students first entered the classroom, I noticed one usually perky friend was looking a little sad. He asked if he could share something about his parents going out of town. I told him yes, we would have some time to share at the end of class. With all those activities, I’m so glad I didn’t forget…

The class was winding down, students sat on the floor as I played a song on the piano. And then I saw my little friend and remembered my promise. He came and stood by me and begin to share, “My parents had to travel to California because my grandfather died.” He continued to explain that he and his sister couldn’t go with them, and he was obviously sad about that.

We talked as a class about how hard it can be when sad things happen and that we needed to be especially nice to this friend, helping him to feel better. Which of course lead to other friends raising their hand to share a sad story. The domino effect was in full swing. I needed to reel it back in before things got completely out of hand.

About the time I had decided not to call on anyone else, I heard this quiet voice from the back of the room. “When’s it my turn?” Some background information is needed-this friend is new, only four days at our school. He also has special needs which include difficulty with eye contact. I haven’t known him long, but I was surprised upon hearing his sweet voice and clear question.

“Of course, you can share. Come on up here by me.” Looking down at the floor he began to talk about how he missed his house. And how his mom had to work all the time. We talked about how hard moving can be. I reassured him that even though he was sad about moving, we were so glad to have him at our school.

Sharing this story with my daughter this evening it dawned on me…I almost missed it. I almost missed the chance to help this special student not only have his turn but also connect with his peers at his new school. He may not have looked me directly in the eyes, but his smile was communication enough. Hopefully, he went home at the end of the day with a new sense of belonging.

Thankful I didn’t miss those few precious moments today at the end of first grade music class…

Forgiveness~Empathy~Friendship

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Experiencing forgiveness, whether on the granting or receiving end, is powerful. Crucial life lessons are learned on both sides of a transgression. The one being forgiven feels a great relief and hopefully learns from their mistakes. The one offering forgiveness appreciates, even more, the instances when they have been on the receiving end. Sounds simple, yet not always the case.

Children often unintentionally demonstrate these truths clearly, if we take the time to watch and listen. Picture one of my kindergarten classes sitting around our music circle, coloring pictures of pumpkins and leaves.  Their fall themed artwork was also to include rhythmic patterns based on phrases about their subject.  For example, “leaves are falling” or “pumpkins everywhere” or “jump in a leaf pile.” Vivaldi’s “Autumn” playing quietly in the background.

Yes, I know it sounds very picturesque, but don’t be fooled.  This is one of those class times that is a struggle for me-giving up a certain level of control and giving students the chance to be social and creative.  It lends itself to a higher noise level and a tiny bit of controlled chaos.  Results are usually pretty cool!  That is until there is a transgression… one student marking on the beautiful, in progress, artwork of his friend.

Typically, it is the student who has been wronged that seeks my attention.  “She stuck her tongue out at me!” “He pulled my hair!” “She told me to shut up!” You get the idea.  On this particular day, the opposite was true. The artist didn’t make a big fuss although disappointed.  I told him he could start a new work if he’d like and asked the other student to apologize. Everyone back to work, all is well. Right?

A few moments later the student who committed the “coloring on my friend’s paper” infraction was standing in front of me with tears in his eyes. “Oh dear, what’s wrong?” I asked. “I apologized, but he wouldn’t accept my apology.” Hmmm…what to do? So many ways I could respond to this conflict. I’m not sure if my choice was the best, but it did have an interesting result.

Empathy-the ability to understand and share the feelings of another.

I began to talk to the teary-eyed transgressor about why his friend was upset. As with my own children, I attempted to help my student put himself in his friend’s place. “How would you feel if you were working hard on your artwork and someone marked on your paper?” On the surface a simple question, but not always an easy place to find yourself. His tears indicated his comprehension, and in a “kindergarten kind of way,” he began to understand.

For the remainder of the class, this particular friend stuck with me like glue. Tears turned to smiles, offers to help with clean up, wanting to have more conversations. Why? Just as being forgiven evokes feelings of relief and freedom, an apology not being accepted brings the opposite-guilt and sadness. However, when we learn to place ourselves in the shoes of the ones we have hurt, then we begin to develop empathy. Our focus moves from being self-centered to others-centered.

Which is more powerful? The ability to forgive or the ability to empathize? I suppose it depends on the situation, transgression, and the people involved. Obviously, consequences come into play, long and short term. But what if we see them as tied together, working hand in hand? I believe if we can help children learn to empathize, having a spirit of forgiveness will naturally follow. And just maybe they will begin to stop and think before making a choice which negatively affects their friend.

But wait, maybe the foundation for this whole discussion should instead be the word “friend.” Becoming a friend is a process. An acquaintance becomes a companion, the companion becomes a supporter, and so on. And if I truly support someone, I’m much more likely to think about the impact of my actions.

Once we learn what it means to be a friend, the potential for both empathy and forgiveness grows exponentially. It still requires effort and work. It does not just magically happen without being intentional. Like everything else worth doing in life, it takes practice. But the results are oh so worth the work!

Here’s to forgiveness, empathy, and friendship.  Especially when witnessed through the eyes of kindergarteners.  May I pay careful attention to opportunities this next week for expressing and teaching these vital life lessons during music class, especially the importance of being a good friend.

You’ve Got a Friend

Time Machine

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During recent Red Ribbon Week activities, our school had a “dress in your favorite decade” day.  I chose the 80’s-big hair, hot pink tank layered over black dress, leggings & leg warmers.  “Girls just wanna have fun” was uttered by colleagues several times throughout the day.  Staying in line with my decade choice, I decided we would spend some time in the 80’s during music class.

One class entered my room particularly quiet, much more so than usual.  Thinking they might be a tough audience, I decided to shake things up a bit.  “You guys don’t know this, but the music room is actually a time machine.  And today, we are taking a trip back to the 1980’s!” Of course, there were a few eye rolls but mostly giggles.  We had so much fun!

Our playlist for the day:

  • Richard Simmons exercise video-I Just Wanna Dance with Somebody
  • Jump by Van Halen
  • Take on Me by A-Ha
  • Always Something There to Remind Me by Naked Eyes
  • We Will Rock You by Queen (actually 1977 but it worked with the boomwhackers)

This activity started me thinking.  Music really is like a time machine.  In one instance we listen to a composition from hundreds of years ago, imagining what life was like when it was written.  The next minute we hear a song on the radio and are immediately transported back to a special event, a certain person, or a memorable place from our own past. Both examples are powerful.

It certainly was the case for me all throughout this 80’s music day.  I smiled as I thought about the fun times spent with my best friend Kim watching music videos on MTV.  Remembered my short-lived dream of becoming a rock star when performing in my high school talent show.  Laughed about the many times my husband has played the keyboard opening to “Jump.” (He is a tuba player, not a pianist-so this was his piano claim to fame!)

As my once quiet class was winding down and my trip down memory lane ending one young friend piped up, “Mrs. Morris, can we please transport back to the 2000’s now?” I laughed, “Why yes, yes we can.”  Our time machine travel was over.  At least until the radio began to play in my car, after school, on my way home…