Tag: family

Simply Sunday

On By Piano girl6 Comments

I am learning
There are many ways
To express my grief
Tears, laughter
Listening
Remembering
But also through words
Not always sad
Many times sweet
No matter which way
I choose in any
Given moment
The healing happens
In the expressing

Transformation

Simple recipe
Words on a card
Pat of butter
Two cups of flour
Ice cold water
The comforting smell
Of pie crust baking
Warm milk
Cocoa powder
Sugar, of course
Touch of vanilla
Continuous stirring
Required
For perfectly
Smooth filling
I can almost
Taste it now-
Watching my sweet Dad
Wearing his apron on
Thanksgiving morning
Remembering
With gratefulness
His smile
As I tasted
The leftover filling-
The simplest of
Ingredients
Transformed
Into so much joy

Yesterday’s poetry circle with Ali Grimshaw https://flashlightbatteries.blog/ was a precious gift. I am grateful for both the words I wrote and the ones I was blessed to hear. ❤️

Rise and Fall

On By Piano girlLeave a comment

Stuffy nose
Tiny cough
Little rattles
Lacing
Your breath
Fussy cry
Flushed cheeks
Finally asleep
Mom and Dad
Cautiously
Creep across
The floor
Standing
Perfectly still
Holding
Their breath
Until seeing
The rise
And fall
Of yours-
Feel better
Little one

I will never forget watching my babies sleep, especially if they were sick. Seeing my son and daughter-in-law care for Emi brings those memories rushing back. This week, she is not feeling well. And, of course, they are taking great care of her. It is hard work deciphering signals from a sick baby.

From the Circle

On By Piano girl4 Comments

Sharing two poems from a recent poetry circle facilitated by Ali Grimshaw. https://flashlightbatteries.blog/. I continue to love this process and the people it allows me to meet. ❤️

Who Me?

I saw you waving
From the side
Of the road-
Who me? I smiled
Wanting to stop
And stay for a bit
But the cars were
Starting to move
And work was waiting-
Seemed silly
In the moment
Nevertheless, I quickly
Snapped your picture
Hoping to capture
Your golden yellow leaves
Grateful to receive
Your promising message
On such a gloomy morning
It’s ok-The rain must fall
We will all be brighter tomorrow

All in the Family

I am known
For crying
My mom is known
For crying
My grandmother
My aunts
Even my daughter
I suppose we
Come by it
Honestly
This tendency
To express both
The happiest and
Saddest moments
In a similar way
Causes some
To ponder
And sometimes
Dare to ask-
Why are you crying?
And if they truly
Want to know
I will gladly tell them
That is if I can stop crying

Roll Over

On By Piano girl2 Comments 
Little hands
Being held
Little hands
Holding on
Pulling, stretching 
Twisting, turning
Muscles growing stronger
Until…Suddenly 
She lets go!
Finding herself 
In a new position 
With a new perspective 
Her world 
Growing bigger
With each turn
Each smile
Each Way to go!
And We love you!
Keep rolling
Baby girl
We are watching

You probably guessed already, but sweet Emi rolled over! We just happened to be on a video chat at that very moment. What a fun celebration! Roll, Emi, roll! ❤️

I am sure time has passed exponentially faster since I became a Gigi…

Simply Sunday

On By Piano girl6 Comments

Yesterday, I
Suddenly remembered
How much I miss you-
At a wedding
Of all places-
Not that I had
Forgotten
It’s just that
Life keeps going
And the missing
Gets all twisted
Within the living-
Yesterday, I
Suddenly remembered
How much I miss you
But the catch in my throat
Turned into a smile
An unexpected surprise

My husband and I attended a wedding yesterday. The groom is the son of our friends. The father-of-the-groom speech caught me by surprise. When he talked about cultivating a friendship with his new daughter-in-law, I immediately thought of my father-in-law. I smiled at the thought of how we teased each other. And how we both had a sweet tooth.

Then I thought about all the others that have passed. My dad, grandparents, friends. But in this moment, it was not sadness I felt. It was gratitude. ❤️

Wide Awake

On By Piano girl5 Comments

Internal eye rolls
Awkward silences
Short-lived
Moments
Remaining
In Memories
Holding
Potential
For regrets
That is, until…
I find myself
On the other side
And any possible
Regret instantly
Transforms into
Appreciation
Understanding-
Now, the parent
Then, the child
Now, the one
Wide Awake
Late at night
Praying
As each name
Each face
Each concern
Crosses my heart
The one hoping
To offer reassurance

Simply Sunday

On By Piano girl10 Comments

Changing Colors

Yesterday fades
Into the light
Of tomorrow
Hellos and
Goodbyes
Echoing
All along its
Colorful trek
Remembering
Without
Looking back
There is little
Room for
Looking back
Only for living
Within each
Change of color
Quietly guiding
Measure by measure-
Yesterday fades
Into the light
Of tomorrow
Greeted
By today-

Time spent with Miss Emi reminds me of the importance of being present. Taking it all in. Not simply for remembering but as part of living. This weekend was filled with baby noises, eating, playing, napping, and lots of family! Oh, and just a tiny bit of shopping. 😉

I am grateful. I am also beginning to understand why my mom always said the house was too quiet after one of our visits with our kiddos. ❤️

Wrap Me Up

On By Piano girl4 Comments

One may
Cause me
To cry
Another
To laugh
Maybe both
At the same time
But I cannot
Travel
Back in time or
Remain endlessly
Engrossed
In a single
Snapshot
Even when it
Has the power
To wrap me up
In a cocoon
Turning my heart
Inside out
As it mixes
The broken
With the upheld
Before releasing

I am thankful my dad had time to get to know Erin, our sweet daughter-in-law. This picture always tugs at my heart. ❤️
Dad was so excited about Emi! I wish he could have met her.

No Longer Kids

On By Piano girl2 Comments

We grew up together. Cousins, a curious mix of family and friends. If I’ve ever talked to you about cousins, you know I have twenty-five first cousins on my mom’s side of the family! I love sharing that fact.

This group was enveloping. Some older, some younger, and some the same age. We played hard and fought sometimes. Learned how to hold babies when a new cousin came along. The older ones served as built-in babysitters.

Now, we’re all grown up. We each took our own path. Don’t see each other often, maybe at a funeral or a rare holiday visit. But when one is sick, as is currently the case, or facing challenges, there is a flood of memories and emotions.

In those moments, I picture us as kids again. Running and playing with no thoughts of accidents, cancer, or death. But reality snaps me back with one look in the mirror. The truth is unavoidable. We are no longer kids.

That truth mixes with our history, leaving me grateful that we grew up together. Leaving me wanting to say, I love you.

A Sentence

On By Piano girl5 Comments

It is not an
Exaggeration to say
Some moments
It feels like
My heart
Might explode

Several chapters
Lived over time
Love, joy, grief
Converge at once
Holding hands
Across my story

One sweet sentence
From a paragraph
That I never
Want to forget
Though impossible
To clearly express

Lately, emotions seem to well up, catching me by surprise.

A sweet conversation with Mom. A moment of missing Dad. Crying on my husband’s shoulder. Chats with my adult children. Watching my son and daughter-in-law care for my granddaughter.

Both the enormity and the smallness of life collide. And I feel every single moment right in the center of my chest. ❤️