Why insist on
Seeing things
Only the way
That you want
To see them?
Everything
A part of
The same
Domain-edges
Clearly defined
Explanations
Always
In black
And white
No room for
Meaningful
Questions or
Incomplete
Answers-
Hues
Undreamt
Wait to be
Discovered
In the hidden
Curves
Of our world
And the secret
Corners
Of our hearts
Yesterday
I smiled
Watching you
Flit and flutter
All around
So small
Compared to
Your surroundings
So small
Yet, able to
Captivate the
Hearts and
Imagination
Of those
Both inside
And outside
Your world-
Realms to which
You offer a
Playful grin
In your daily
Flitting and
Fluttering
Of living
On our trip, I often noticed the tiny things around us. In the water, on the sand, in the rainforest-the massive made up of the minuscule. If only I’d had a microscope!
Of course, the big picture was also captivating. Even a panoramic taken through a telescope would not do it justice. Maybe just that recognition is enough. I’m not sure. I suppose there is room for interpretation. 😉
Today was our last day in Maui. Sad to leave but ready to be home. I will miss the slower pace of life here. It is refreshing.
A few things I take with me.
The constant rhythm of ocean waves- A reminder to listen thoughtfully.
The colorful contrasts between land, sea, and sky-A reminder to look curiously.
The ever-changing view from one day to the next from the same spot-A reminder to expect surprises.
That there is such a thing as terrifyingly beautiful views. Terrifying if only due to the path required to witness them.
And the knowledge that calm is only a breath away-maybe two. 😉
The love felt in celebrating thirty years of marriage in this beautiful place-Reminding me to be graciously grateful.
Day before vacation
Awakened from a
No-sense-dream
A phone ringing
Several missed calls
And text messages
Confused does
Not justly
Describe my mood
I was frantic
A panicked spiral
Attempting to take hold-
Not just a mess
But a hot mess
According to
My husband
Shhh…
He was right
I need you
To stand still
And take a
Deep breath
Breathing out
I felt the tears
Beginning to form
This is me
But only
A part of me
Today, I sit
In the airport
Traveling within this
Thirty-year love
And we are ok
Better than ok
Five tiny fingers
Wrapped
Around my thumb
Eyelids heavy
With sleep
Let it fall
As I hold you
Little one
And dream
Your dreams
While I remember mine
My daughter, Rachel, wrote the following poem not long after my dad passed away. It paints a beautiful picture of the way we need and care for each other. I asked her if I could share. ❤️
Your mom needs you
Is a call to action
I do not take lightly
My Dad said this to me
After learning my mom had lost her own father
I held her tight in my arms
Breathing deep and slow
Like she had done for me
so many times before
Your mom needs us
My Dad said to her
As they prepared to leave
I imagine she held her mom tight in her arms
Breathing deep and slow
Like she had done for her
So many times before
How precious it is
To need your mom
And be needed by her
-Rachel Morris
The day we
Laid you to rest
The sun shone brightly
The wind blew
Stronger than
A breeze
And carried
A cold bite
Uneven, at best
Like my emotions
Visited again today
Knelt down
By the dirt
And smiled
Hi, Dad
The sun shone brightly
No breeze to cool the air
The sky was a beautiful blue
Somehow, felt balanced-
Surprisingly, so did I
Soft baby blanket
Tiny pink hat
Your sweet face
All that we
Could see
All that we
Needed to see
Eyes still closed
Your new cry
Broke my heart
Hi, Honey
Your dad
Held you close
My heart filled
To overflowing
My baby
Holding
His baby
So small
Yet, captivating
I’m unable to
Look away-
Uncertainty
Arrives first
But does not
Settle in
Curiosity soon
Takes its place
I continue to watch
Not knowing is ok
Maybe even better
Allows more space
For my thoughts
To wander
As I watch this
Tiny being of light
A bright spark of life
Knowing it will
Pass from my sight
And I will have to wait
Until it returns
Once again
Drawing my eyes
As my heart follows
Close behind
I continue to love the writing circle. You never know what is going to show up on the page. Sometimes, I do not know where the words come from or what they mean. Then I read them out loud to caring, intentional listeners and take in their reflections.
The above poem was written in our most recent circle with Ali Grimshaw. https://flashlightbatteries.blog/ Inspired by a line from the poem A Note by Wislawa Szymborska.
To follow a spark on the wind with your eyes.
What do you think I was writing about? 😉
What is wrong with me? It took a couple of hours to solve the mystery. Though solving did not mean feelings subsided. The emotional range of my morning hit hard and fast.
Why am I surprised? Sunday is our son’s first Father’s Day! It is also the first Father’s Day without Dad. So much joy and sadness co-exist. But I know I’m not alone.
How are you today? My friend Darryl stopped by today. His home is on the streets. He appeared to be having a particularly rough day. Yet, he made a point to ask how I was doing.
Should I answer honestly? His dad also recently died. He didn’t know for several weeks. So many regrets. Told him I was struggling and mentioned that Sunday was Father’s Day.
Sunday is Father’s Day? A first for us both. Reminded him that we have to keep going. It is ok to be sad, but we can’t stay there.
What is wrong with me? I miss my dad. I miss my father-in-law. But I also celebrate my son. And I celebrate my husband-all great dads!
What are the answers for today? There is strength in honesty. Sorrow shared is easier to carry. And joy shared multiplies. ❤️
Wounds left behind
By trauma’s
Repeated strikes
Scar deep
The pain pulsing
Long after
The bruises
Disappear-
Difficult to
Comprehend
Particularly when
Exacted on the weak
And Innocent-
Layers of insecurity
Lead to repeated
Questions that
Often require
Deciphering
Repeated
Questions
Requiring
Repeated
Answers-
All the above
Requiring
Patience-
Uncomfortable
Necessary work
Sewing stitches
In hopes of mending
Child abuse is not pleasant to think about or talk about. But unpleasant conversations are necessary for positive change. Acknowledgment and patience are the beginning steps.
A recent visit with a sweet friend brought this ugly truth clearly into view. But there is hope. Even if it comes in small doses. Even if face-to-face caring tests my patience more than I wish to admit…
I remain in awe of the counselors, therapists, case workers, etc who sew these stitches every day.
Piano Girl 