Despite the upbeat music playing in my car
The drive to work was eerily quiet –
A pale brown deer stood alone
in the corner of the field I pass daily-
I barely caught a glimpse
of her head turning as I drove past
Happy and sad at the same time
A combination of feelings I understand
I don’t understand the deafening
cries to clean up the streets
simultaneously seeking to silence
the cries of hurting hearts
I don’t understand tearing a man
from the only home he knows
destroying his tent and what few
belongings he owns
So much prideful noise, such a lack
of compassion and understanding-
The streets are eerily clean, but
our hearts must answer
the frightening question
hanging stagnant in the air-
Where did the people go?
Tag: fear
Fear and Hope
The Unknown
Thought of with excitement,
or overwhelming fear.
For me, the fear part usually
rises in the middle of the night.
Like waking up from a dream
with a sudden Gasp!
Except, this kind of fear is not a dream.
Dream or no dream, I have
no control over the outcome.
And worrying about all that remains unseen,
does nothing to enhance my state of being.
Not to say it is easy to push the fear away, but I keep trying…
Breathe.
Look out the window.
Find that glimmer of hope
calling to your soul, ready and waiting
to swallow up your fears.
Her Song
I know her song,
though it changes often.
Depends on the day’s path.
Does she choose her own?
I wonder.
When traveling through
A grove of Aspens,
her melody is gentle and sweet.
Each glistening leaf
adds a note of color.
When coursing over rough rocks
on the shoreline, her melody
grows stronger, driving forward
with each pulse of the current.
Both melodies, both paths,
inspire awe and wonder.
Listen. What is she singing for you today?
Poems from the poetry circle. ❤️
What Can I Do?
Gray clouds linger
Matching the heaviness
Hovering over my heart-
As deceptions spread
Anger and sadness
Try to sneak in and
Overtake my emotions-
But worry and fear are not
The way forward-
Returning hate for deception
Will not lift this haze-
Love enveloped in grace
Mercy grown from love
Sentiments that begin to
Calm my anxious thoughts-
The gray clouds will lift
Long before this heaviness
Hovering over my heart
But I must believe it, too,
Will eventually clear-
In the meantime,
What can I do?
Love my neighbor as myself
Not Enough
Feeling the need to speak
Knowing the importance of
Choosing my words
Carefully-
Not speaking is unacceptable-
Emotions swirl in my head
Threatening to exit in a scream-
Until I pause
Take a breath
Whisper a prayer
Allowing it all to be filtered
Though my heart –
Love your neighbor as yourself
Leaves no room to vilify or dehumanize-
Be kind and compassionate to one another
Holds no space for intimidation and hatred-
Love those who are foreigners,
For you yourselves were foreigners
Carries no capacity for arrogance or exile-
Choosing my words carefully
Knowing they are not enough
And actions must follow
Photos taken by me in Washington, D.C.
Evidence
I’ve held my tears close
Hesitantly accepting
The sun’s warmth
On my face
But the disappointment
And questions with no answers
Will no longer be ignored
Cascading down with today’s rain
I suppose this is where faith steps in
It is, after all, believing
In what I can’t see-
A simple definition, yes
Sometimes those are
The ones to hold close
And I must believe
Love continues to reside
Even in places where evidence
Is not clearly evident-
And if it is lost, to think it can
Once again, be found
It may begin with simple words
I hear you.
I love you.
I see you.
I am sorry.
But its survival requires
Much more than words-
Please don’t give me opinions
Or long-held beliefs
Both are easily skewed
By outward influences
Where truth and lies
Are purposefully blurred
Instead, close your eyes
Open your heart
Focus on the sound
Of your heartbeat
Helping it to grow
More in sync with mine
As we breathe
As we silently pray
Knowing I am afraid, too
The Challenge
No need to hurry
No need to hesitate
Yet, simply being
Is sometimes
The hardest thing to do
I wonder why?
Why are we so often
Afraid to be still
Breathe in
Breathe out
Not thinking about
The next moment
The next day
The next year
Whether they arrive or not
My worry carries no sway
Today I choose
To be still
Breathe in
Breathe out
Accepting that it is okay
To not know
Where my next step may lead
I stood in line to vote this morning. A right and responsibility I do not take lightly. And now, like everyone else, I wait. The challenge is to wait calmly, pushing worry away.
Two Different Things
Facing my fears-
Does that mean the same
As overcoming them?
I don’t think so
It doesn’t feel that way
In the moment
Perhaps they’re two
Different things-
Understanding fear’s roots
Proves helpful
And yet, the feelings
Do not simply vanish
Anxious, irrational fears
Of once again being
Out of control
Suddenly flood
Every part of my body-
Time to stop
Take a breath
Sit down
Look directly ahead
Or, if necessary
Close my eyes
Allow tears to fall
And that is ok-
It is helpful to have
Someone next to me
Someone I trust
Who will say
You are safe
It’s ok to close your eyes
You can open your eyes now
And when I step out
Of my comfort zone
Even just a little says
I’m so proud of you!
Confession
Do not live in fear
Does not mean
I am never afraid
Live a life of joy
Does not mean
I am never sad-
When afraid
I remember love
When sad
I remember hope
Neither the words
Or the feelings
Contradict each other
Instead, they affirm
Causing my heart
To beat stronger
And my faith
To grow deeper
Stronger Than Hate
I sense an oppression
More relentless than
This current heatwave
An already heavy
Weight of Worry
Now increased by fear
From hateful words
Spewed on repeat
Intended to threaten even
The most vulnerable-
Words holding no truth
Words intending to
Burn the schoolhouse
To the ground
Leaving our children
To play in the ashes-
And yet
We know
Light shines
In the darkness
We know
Love overcomes hate
We know
Standing together
In those truths
Is the only way
To permeate
The darkest of times
The hardest of hearts
Schools are like mini-communities. Each classroom is its own family. Everyone belongs no matter what. Learning to get along, solving problems, and growing. Playing, laughing, disagreeing, forgiving. And that is only in the first thirty minutes of the day! 😉
These are challenging times for public education. There are constant attacks laced with political rhetoric that have no place in conversations regarding education. Rhetoric repeated so much it has led to threats of violence. And threats only place another layer of fear and stress on students, parents, teachers, and staff.
My friends, family, former colleagues, and former students have faced those threats this past week. And though I am no longer in the classroom, my heart is heavy. I could not let this week pass without sending them this message. I see you! I love you! What you do matters! ❤️
Inviting Light
Days when
Words try to
Stay hidden
In the deep
Crevices
Of my mind
No one else
May enter
Unless invited
I attempt to
Pry them out
Giving voice
To the feelings
Held behind
The words
While knowing
That sharing
The positives
Will prove easier
Than sharing
The negatives
Days when
Words try to
Stay hidden
I am learning
And re-learning
To write them down
Inviting light
To gently restore
The fractures
While easing my fears
Piano Girl 