Tag: daughters

Dear Grief

On By Piano girl5 Comments

My attempts to ignore you
These past few days were futile
You just kept knocking –
I should have expected your visit
After all, It’s Christmas time
Dad loved Christmas
Baking pies, giving gifts, helping others
I miss him–
That’s why I opened the door
And let you in
To remember how much I miss him-
At first, your visit caused panic
Sending me on a fruitless search
Through old voicemails
Somehow, the resulting tears
Cleared space for sweet memories-
One year, when I was grown
Dad gave me a tiny doll for Christmas
I would always be his little girl-
What I’m trying to say is
Keep Knocking, Grief
I may not answer right away
Still, I promise I won’t forget

Undertow

On By Piano girl8 Comments

I’m not sure
If sad is
The right word
I’m not sure
If sad is
The right feeling
Sometimes emotions
Seem to trade places
Not in a swirling
Sea of whitecaps
Tossing me from
Side to side
No, more like
A silent undertow
Gently shifting sand
Beneath my feet-
Knowing I can’t
Call you to say
Happy Father’s Day!
But remembering
All the times I heard
Thank you! How’s my little girl?

Simply Sunday

On By Piano girl11 Comments

When we know what our children want from life, we want those things for them. Whether it is finding that first apartment, going to college, getting a job, or finding their life partner.

That last one has its challenges. Finding that one person who gets us. One who loves us for who we are. But when it happens, there’s a profound combination of excitement and calm.

All that being said…

Our daughter, Rachel, got engaged this week! ❤️ Simply seeing the smile on her face (and his) makes me happy. And seeing them together gives me hope for the future.

Welcome to the family, Austen!

Miles Away

On By Piano girl12 Comments

It could be the one-hundred-plus-excessive-heat-warning temperatures.

It could be because I’m missing Dad.

It’s most likely an all-of-the-above answer to any multiple-choice question you might ask.

Whatever the question or the answer, my thoughts keep drifting.

What would I give?
To rest in
The Wisdom
Of your shade
To sit beneath 
Limbs-curved
And crooked from
Over a century 
Of growing
Reaching 
Learning to be-
Witness to 
Stories unseen
Standing vigil
Thru seasons of
Darkness 
And light
Firmly holding
In your arms
All those seeking rest-
What would I give?
To rest in
The Wisdom
Of your shade-
Listening 
As the tide rolls in
Wondering 
If you can hear it, too
Lahaina Banyan Court Park-Maui, HI photo credit Gart Morris ❤️

Smiles and Tears

On By Piano girl9 Comments

Memories of you
Make me smile
Fried chicken leg
In my little hands
Sitting in your lap
At the table
You are smiling
Wearing a white t-shirt-
Maybe that is
An actual picture
Not a memory-
Little red wagon
Transportation
For your first
Grandchild, smiling
As you pulled him
Around the neighborhood
Now that one
I can recall-
No longer having
The opportunity
To make memories
With you makes me cry-
A human response
I know-time spent
In the present
In the physical
Where Memories
Are created
For the future
But we are
So much more
Than the physical
Standing
In this present
Space and time
And though I may not
Understand it all
And sometimes
Feel sadness
In every strand
Of my being
All the way
To the core
Hope lives both
In the smiles
And in the tears

Simply Sunday

On By Piano girl11 Comments

Grief

A black cloud
Moved across
The gray
Morning sky
Circling, swirling
Changing shape
Separating
Coming back
Together
Its fluctuations
Matching
My grief-
Moving closer
I could see
It was not
A cloud
But a flock
Of birds-
They landed
On the branches
Of barren trees
Perched up high
Unwavering
Their feathers
A brief replacement
For recently
Fallen leaves
Their stillness
Giving my heart
A moment to rest
Catch my breath
Though tears
Continued to flow

My sweet dad passed away early this morning. My heart is broken. I am forever grateful that he was my dad. He had a gentle strength about him. There is so much I want to remember and reflect over. But for now, this is all I can share.

Simply Sunday

On By Piano girl6 Comments

Let Me Out

Plan in place
Appointment
Scheduled
Released
Set free
Headed
Home
Freedom
Sleep
In your
Own bed
Happy
Relieved
Thankful
One day
At a time

After more than a week in the hospital, my sweet dad was released this afternoon. They let me out! He called me from the car. Told me exactly what road they were on. Said they would be home after a quick stop at the pharmacy.

His case is complicated. So many factors. But today, we are grateful for a plan that allowed him to go home. I hope to visit very soon. ❤️

Simply Sunday

On By Piano girl16 Comments

Graduation Day!

Strength and Beauty
Were present
From the start
Kindness and
Consideration
Toward those
Different from her
Emerged early on
The intrinsic notion
That different
Does not translate
Into less than
That we all
Have a place
In this world
And sometimes
An advocate is needed
To help others
Realize their abilities-
Compassion
Turned to passion
Passion to action
Goals set
Challenges
Accepted-
A bright light
In my life since
The day she was born
And to countless others
Throughout her journey

Our sweet daughter, Rachel, graduated from KU today with her Master’s Degree! She is a high school special education teacher, specializing in transition services. We are so proud! ❤️

A New Day

On By Piano girl1 Comment

Bright
Sunshine
Ushers in
A new day
Along with it
A new perspective
Yesterday
The sky was
Sleepy
Gray
Still
Do you think
Like us, it also
Needed rest?
Thinking
Quiet
Still
Appreciating
Each moment
Given
Accepting
Each goodbye
Spoken
Certain
The sweetest
Symbol
For love
Rooted deep
In our hearts
Is a smile
Accompanied
By tears

We will be driving home today. And though I am confident in my dad’s medical care and progress, it was hard to say goodbye.

This morning, the sun shone brightly on Pinnacle Mountain. A landmark that was crucial in my growing up years. Whether viewing it from a distance or standing on its peak, always enamored with its beauty.

When trying to explain where I grew up. Have you heard of Pinnacle Mountain? I grew up out in the country, about three miles from there.

I was thankful for its beautiful colors this morning to guide us out.

I will be back soon! ❤️

The Key

On By Piano girl2 Comments

Room is quiet
Only a steady
Sound of air
Flowing from
A plastic tube
Occasional
Snore from Dad
Glass doors
Provide a window
To the hallway
Doctors walking past
Carts rolling by
With food, linens,
Cleaning supplies-
Right outside sits
The faithful one
Never far away
Caring for others
Keeping track of
Vital signs
Medication
Answering questions
Calming fears-
I know it is
A team effort
But I believe
Nurses hold the key

I wrote this poem while sitting with my Dad in ICU after his open-heart surgery. I was amazed by and thankful for the care he received, especially his nurses. ❤