Broken hearts, happy hearts
Both a part of this life
When we feel lost
Waiting to be found
When we are found
Hoping never
To be lost again
The heart measures
Time differently
It never forgets
Filling, breaking, mending
Then filling again
It never forgets
Growing, loving, beating
In sync with another
Following the tick-tock
Of the clock even though
An inaccurate gauge-
Where hearts
Are concerned
Time is fluid
Holding the possibilities
Of the universe
Within the rhythm
Of each heartbeat
Two people separated by
Doors, walls, a long hallway
One entered
The other remained
Not allowed to cross
This particular threshold
Leading to necessary discomfort
A small room where muscles
Are pinched and prodded
Where skin is broken
Then held together
Only one entered
The other remained
Both feeling discomfort
One physical
One emotional
Both holding tight
That is love
Connection that cannot
Be separated by
Doors, walls, or a long hallway
My husband, Gart, does not like for me to brag about him. Wednesday morning, he sat in not one but two different waiting rooms while I had a biopsy followed by a CT scan.
I knew no matter what happened, he would be there when I walked back out. Ready to listen and encourage. “Let’s not worry until we have something to worry about,” he would say.
That evening, I participated in my weekly poetry circle. This poem came from that time. Writing and listening with a group I have grown to love and trust.
I am thankful to report the biopsy showed no cancer! I will follow-up with my doctor next week. And I know if I need him to, he will wait once again in another waiting room. ❤
We are experiencing unusual winter weather in Oklahoma this week. Frigid temperatures and freezing rain made for a slow drive this morning. I had an early morning appointment at the hospital.
When looking directly out of the front windshield, all seemed gray. Bare trees were covered in ice. Brown and white were mixed on the road from the sand. A layer of white covered the grass. The sky was filled with gray clouds.
Sounds like a dreary scene. And parts of it could be described that way. But there were also bits of wonder. The icy tree limbs brought thoughts of a winter wonderland. Evergreens with white tips provided a lovely visual, making the green stand out.
I looked up and around, giving more attention to the sky, and noticed something. There were tiny hints of blue mixed with the gray. I had to squint to see it, but it was there. The sky was not completely gray, after all.
Funny how life is sometimes that way…squinting to see the blue skies.
Our hospital trip today was for a biopsy/CT scan. A necessary though unwanted addendum to my recent MRI day. MRI Day
As I’ve said before, I’m grateful for good health care. But honestly, I was nervous about these tests.
That blue mixed in with the gray this morning was a perfect reminder of the realities of this life. Beautiful, sad, joyful, difficult…all of it meshed together. That is life.
As I began to feel the strength from those offering prayers on my behalf, I also realized my own prayers for peace had been answered. That answer came through those swaths of blue sky mixed in with the gray.
What am I looking for?
Am I looking for anything?
Looking implies intent
As if something is missing-
Where are my keys?
Or a void needs filling-
Where is my friend?
If looking is not
An active part of my day
Does that mean I am
Simply roaming
Counting the minutes
Until the day is done?
Some days…
But on those other days,
I sometimes find something-
Something I didn’t even know I needed
Several times this past week, I thought about painting. An extra colorful sunrise on my drive to work or maybe the evening sky-I would notice a scene and think, “Wonder if I could paint that?”
Of course, time passed, and I used none of it for painting…until today.
My sister-in-law, Paula, was in town this weekend. She invited me and my daughter, Rachel, to a brunch today at my mother-in-law’s house. Thought it would be nice to have some girl time.
When Rachel and I walked in, it looked like a party! Pretty pink plates with gold polka dots, matching napkins graced a gold tablecloth. A coffee bar, mimosa bar, yogurt bar, scones, and yummy croissant breakfast sandwiches were displayed in the kitchen.
What a surprise! And then I noticed the centerpiece on the table. It was a flowery coffee cup with the letter K filled with pink flowers. Curious. Then my sweet mother-in-law, June, said, “Well, this brunch is for you.”
I have been a little nervous about some upcoming medical tests. The brunch was supposed to be a pick-me-up. That it was. ❤
We ate, laughed, talked, prayed, and I cried just a little. We also baked cookies and watched a great movie. I returned home relaxed and encouraged.
Guess what I did once back home? Painted! Maybe not one of the skies from previous days, but that does not matter. The love and kindness of family reminded me of the importance of slowing down. Enjoying time without worrying about what is to come.
It has been many years since
I sat around a campfire,
Or any fire created by
Putting a flame to a branch
Once belonging to a tree
Recent fires were made from
Glass, manufactured logs, and gas
Although these provide heat
As well as beauty
Something was missing
Perhaps it was the smell
Rising from the meeting
Of flame and wood
Changing based on
The origin of the tree
Perhaps it was the sight
Of the ashes left behind
Once the fire has gone out
Reminding us of our origins
And where our bodies will return
An unquestioned reliance
Assures us one spark will
Transform the cold night air
Maybe that was the difference-
The cold night air
Actually, I think there are
Too many differences to count-
Each one offering lessons
Frailty and faithfulness in
The physical and spiritual
Precious, fleeting, brief
There is never enough-
We want it to slow down,
Then speed right back up.
I’m speaking about time, of course-
Such a fascinating concept
We break it down into
Hours, minutes, seconds
Weeks, months, years
To what end?
Today, I played
A piece of music
On the piano
Baroque music written
Four-hundred years ago
Can that be correct?
History says it’s so
As amazing as the
Four-hundred years
May sound, the wonder
Occurred in one brief moment-
The eyes of a child
Listening and watching
Questioning how those
Notes on the page
Made their way
To my hands
I love playing the piano for my students. The only downside is not being able to teach all of them to play. Someone always asks, and I smile, wishing that was possible. In my dream teaching world, I would have a room full of keyboards. And each student would have the opportunity to experience that note-to-eyes-to-hands connection.
This week while playing, I heard one of them whisper, “That must be a recording.” Then they snuck over and peeked around the side of the piano. Another class was lining up to leave. One little boy said, “One of my favorite things today was hearing you play the piano.”
And one of my favorite things was being able to play the piano for you… ❤
She stood out in the crowd of people
Waiting on the street
Waiting to cross to the other side
Headed home from a busy day at work
Or perhaps meeting a friend for dinner
Whatever the destination, it was easy
To get lost in the crowd
She carefully considered this fact
There was a sense of mystery in
The thought of intentionally getting lost
Meeting a mysterious stranger
Forgetting her present struggles
But then she remembered her cat
Waiting by the door for her arrival
And the lovely tulips she carried
Needed a vase and water
Besides, the red coat she wore
Made it practically impossible to disappear
Perhaps standing out in the crowd
Was the better choice
This post was written in response to the SoCS writing prompt for January 23, 2021-close eyes and point. https://lindaghill.com/2021/01/22/the-friday-reminder-for-socs-jusjojan-2021-daily-prompt-jan-23rd/
What a fun way to start my Saturday! 🙂
We have days dedicated to celebrating almost everything. Days for donuts, coffee, moms, dads, cats, and dogs-and the list goes on and on. Today was MRI day. At least, that is what I decided to proclaim. Especially now that my doctor insists I have one in addition to my mammogram every year.
They are not particularly fun. Imagine lying face down on a narrow table. White towels lining the hole where your face rests. Your arms straight out in front-think Superman pose. No, wait-Wonder Woman. 😉
Once in position, you must be perfectly still for thirty minutes. Perfectly still while the tube you are in makes random, intermittent noises, as if preparing for take-off. Actually, it is just a really loud camera.
I know this probably does not sound like something to celebrate. But this year, I choose to view it differently. I am celebrating deep breaths that helped me to relax. I am celebrating old hymns and classic James Taylor singing inside my head. I am celebrating medical science that says early detection is key.
Even though physically uncomfortable, the above reasons eased my anxiety. And I was reminded that I can do hard things. So, get your mammograms! And if your doctor says the word MRI, you can do it! Until next year! 💕
Last Friday was my first day back at school since before Christmas break. Not only that, the two weeks before Christmas break, we were in distance learning. Basically, my students and I had not been face-to-face for six weeks.
Two of my classes on Friday were brand new. These students had chosen virtual education for the first semester but were now returning to in-person learning. Some faces I recognized from last year, but there were many new ones.
I quickly realized the challenges of the day. There was a little hesitation from older students. One of my friends said, “Oh, Mrs. Morris! I thought you had quit.” I quickly reassured him that “Goodness no! I have been sick.”
Old connections needed to be reestablished. New connections had to be created. Good, but challenging work. I tried to physically rest as much as possible while teaching. But that was impossible with my first and second-grade classes.
Those littles were excited and ready for music. I found myself moving with them, pouring out what energy I had left. Those smiles, wide eyes, listening ears…responding and participating. It was so much fun!
At the end of the day, I was tired. But it was a good tired. The kind that gives me hope and pushes me to keep going.
There is such a tired
As good tired
Feeling accomplished
After working hard
Doing the right thing,
Simply because it’s
The right thing to do-
Not because of
Reaching the next
Step on the ladder
That is a never-ending
Cycle of exhaustion
Dependent on approval
Of those standing by
Watching and waiting
For a fall from grace-
No, this tired says
Job well-done
Now it is time to rest,
Sit beside quiet waters,
Listen and let the sound
Refresh mind, body, and spirit
As the work of life continues,
And good tired becomes
A recurring theme
Piano Girl 