Tag: Memories

Simply Sunday

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Have a Seat

One last sit
On the couch
Walk around the
Neighborhood
Swing on the swing
Slide down the slide-
Cleaning out
Packing up
Off on a new
Adventure-
Life’s changes
Don’t always
Provide opportunity
To savor the lasts
But when it does
May I suggest
Sitting on that
Old couch
Just a little bit longer-

Our daughter moved this weekend. Not far away, thankfully. 😉 As we talked about the specifics of loading and unloading, she reminded me of an earlier move.

The kids were young. We were preparing for a big move, and had a moving sale. Our things displayed in the front yard. I will never forget one request from the kids. Can we please have one last sit on the couch?

After all these years, I think I’m beginning to understand the wisdom in their request. ❤️

Tiny Apartment

On By Piano girl2 Comments

I’ve been known to say
-Referencing a
A certain time
In my life-
I was quite a mess!
Thought I hid it well
At the time
But truthfully
Some things
Cannot be hidden-
Insecurity paired
With indecisiveness
Those two should not
Be left unattended!
Neither should
Guilt and regret
Those four took up
Way too much space
In my tiny apartment
Thankfully, circumstances
Required interactions outside
The voice in my head
And eventually, I was
Able to say
I’m no longer a mess!
Hmmm…what would be the opposite?

Sharing a poem from a recent writing circle facilitated by Ali Grimshaw. https://flashlightbatteries.blog/ Perhaps you can relate. 😉

Simply Sunday

On By Piano girl9 Comments

I was anxious about the day-our first Thanksgiving without Dad. It was a lovely day. I enjoyed catching up with my extended family. Laughing with my husband and grown children. Snuggling with my sweet granddaughter.

Thinking about how to handle my emotions before the day arrived proved helpful. Though I missed Dad, I did not want it to be a sad day.

There was a moment when tears began to swell. I took a deep breath and snuggled sweet Emi a little closer. Then watched the day unfold-thankful.

One of my favorite Thanksgiving memories! ❤️
Sweeter than pie!

Simply Sunday

On By Piano girl6 Comments

I am learning
There are many ways
To express my grief
Tears, laughter
Listening
Remembering
But also through words
Not always sad
Many times sweet
No matter which way
I choose in any
Given moment
The healing happens
In the expressing

Transformation

Simple recipe
Words on a card
Pat of butter
Two cups of flour
Ice cold water
The comforting smell
Of pie crust baking
Warm milk
Cocoa powder
Sugar, of course
Touch of vanilla
Continuous stirring
Required
For perfectly
Smooth filling
I can almost
Taste it now-
Watching my sweet Dad
Wearing his apron on
Thanksgiving morning
Remembering
With gratefulness
His smile
As I tasted
The leftover filling-
The simplest of
Ingredients
Transformed
Into so much joy

Yesterday’s poetry circle with Ali Grimshaw https://flashlightbatteries.blog/ was a precious gift. I am grateful for both the words I wrote and the ones I was blessed to hear. ❤️

Simply Sunday

On By Piano girl6 Comments

Yesterday, I
Suddenly remembered
How much I miss you-
At a wedding
Of all places-
Not that I had
Forgotten
It’s just that
Life keeps going
And the missing
Gets all twisted
Within the living-
Yesterday, I
Suddenly remembered
How much I miss you
But the catch in my throat
Turned into a smile
An unexpected surprise

My husband and I attended a wedding yesterday. The groom is the son of our friends. The father-of-the-groom speech caught me by surprise. When he talked about cultivating a friendship with his new daughter-in-law, I immediately thought of my father-in-law. I smiled at the thought of how we teased each other. And how we both had a sweet tooth.

Then I thought about all the others that have passed. My dad, grandparents, friends. But in this moment, it was not sadness I felt. It was gratitude. ❤️

Wrap Me Up

On By Piano girl4 Comments

One may
Cause me
To cry
Another
To laugh
Maybe both
At the same time
But I cannot
Travel
Back in time or
Remain endlessly
Engrossed
In a single
Snapshot
Even when it
Has the power
To wrap me up
In a cocoon
Turning my heart
Inside out
As it mixes
The broken
With the upheld
Before releasing

I am thankful my dad had time to get to know Erin, our sweet daughter-in-law. This picture always tugs at my heart. ❤️
Dad was so excited about Emi! I wish he could have met her.

Simply Sunday

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This time
It snuck in
With a dream
One of those
Chaotic
Makes-no-sense
Dreams
Ending suddenly
In a moment
Of clarity-
A familiar photo
From the past
One I have seen
Many times-
And I woke up
Remembering
How much I miss you

After a great first week at my new job, I wasn’t expecting a visit from grief. But that’s how it goes. My capacity to hold this grief will continue to grow. That acceptance that death is part of life. It does not make me miss my dad any less. But it does allow me to both cry and smile over sweet memories. ❤️

No Longer Kids

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We grew up together. Cousins, a curious mix of family and friends. If I’ve ever talked to you about cousins, you know I have twenty-five first cousins on my mom’s side of the family! I love sharing that fact.

This group was enveloping. Some older, some younger, and some the same age. We played hard and fought sometimes. Learned how to hold babies when a new cousin came along. The older ones served as built-in babysitters.

Now, we’re all grown up. We each took our own path. Don’t see each other often, maybe at a funeral or a rare holiday visit. But when one is sick, as is currently the case, or facing challenges, there is a flood of memories and emotions.

In those moments, I picture us as kids again. Running and playing with no thoughts of accidents, cancer, or death. But reality snaps me back with one look in the mirror. The truth is unavoidable. We are no longer kids.

That truth mixes with our history, leaving me grateful that we grew up together. Leaving me wanting to say, I love you.

Simply Sunday

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Sitting in a rocker in front of Cracker Barrell in Alma, AR, I almost wrote 1993 instead of 2023 at the top of my journal page. This spot between Tulsa, OK, and Little Rock, AR, has been our family meeting place for years. I was waiting for my brother to drop off my mom this time.

Many a summer or spring break adventure started there. Sometimes, it was our kids going to spend a week with grandparents. Other times, it was me having some extended family time. And when you have as many cousins as me, extra time is needed.

So, what took me back to 1993? It was an eventful year for us! We were married in May, moved in July, and had a baby the following December. And that’s when it all started. Traveling the highway between Arkansas and Oklahoma, sometimes stopping in the middle for a drop-off or pick-up.

And this time, the end result was great-grandma meeting great-granddaughter for the first time. 💗

Scenes From a Movie

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I love the movie, Begin Again, starring Keira Knightley and Mark Ruffalo. It’s a story about love lost and found, life lessons, and family. All of it happens around and within the gift of music.

I was recently reminded of one of my favorite scenes. Picture two people traversing the city at night. Their focus is a portable CD player and a headphone jack splitter. Technology allows them to hear the same music in a personal way.

A version of this scene happens twice in the movie. The first time, one character shares a memory with a new friend. The second time, he is seeking a second chance. Just watch the movie. Trust me!

So, what would make me think about this scene in this movie while on a plane flying to Hawaii?

My husband is techy. When traveling, we are all set with earbuds, wi-fi, chargers-whatever we might need or want for communication and entertainment. Technical difficulties? He is my guy!

As we got settled for our flight, he handed me his earbuds. I scrolled thru my iTunes, checking to see what music I had downloaded. Music playing during take-off is a must! It helps me relax.

I fiddled with the earbuds and Bluetooth settings. Before I could make a choice, music magically started playing in my ears.

My husband, Gart, tapped me on the shoulder. He smiled, pointing at his phone device settings. He had connected both his headphones and my earbuds to his iPad. We can listen together. And we did! 🎶❤️🎶