Tiny buds of worry Anxiously wait To be watered Desiring to open But hesitant Unsure of responses Will reactions Be refreshing- Like a gentle rain Or harsh- A downpour filled With ice pellets One response holds The power to make The buds shrink Overcome by Uncertainty until They wither and die The other holds the Promise of washing The worry away Gently nurturing Watching and listening As confidence blooms
At the beginning of quarantine, we worked a couple of jigsaw puzzles at our house. A way to pass the time while keeping the brain working. It is always interesting to me to watch how tiny pieces fit together to create one big picture.
The pieces all have different colors and shapes. Each one with its own place. Only fitting together with those directly surrounding. The togetherness grows exponentially. However, if there is just one missing piece, the picture is incomplete. So frustrating.
Each of us is born into a picture. With a family that will love us and helps us grow. Sadly, that is not always the case. And the missing pieces often leave big holes.
Children especially have a difficult time finding their place when these pieces are missing. They do not understand. Whether withdrawing or acting out, they are seeking control. This is sometimes hard to remember as a teacher.
Yesterday, I reacted to certain behaviors with little thought to what was behind them. They were frustrated. I was frustrated. I kept thinking, “If only these friends would listen and follow directions like everyone else!”
This morning, I woke up thinking about those friends. I wanted to find a way to improve the situation. Find a way to encourage appropriate behavior and participation. After all, music class is supposed to be fun!
But how? One word came to mind-connections. I know that is the key. Sometimes I just need a reminder.
Today, I worked on those connections. In the process, I discovered some of the missing pieces. The death of a parent, negative influences from older siblings, family instability. These little ones are dealing with big emotions and don’t know why or how to express them.
Our time together was brief. Leaving me with more questions than answers. However, there was also a glimmer of hope. Little faces, often angry, smiling just a bit. Showing a desire to do the right thing. Even if only able for a limited amount of time.
There is no way for me to fill in those missing pieces. They are irreplaceable. All I can do is recognize and acknowledge. But maybe the edges can be blurred, and a new picture of belonging will emerge. Causing the frustrations of the missing pieces to fade.
Some days On the inside I am still a child Finding her way in this Ever-changing world Asking the same Old questions- Where do I belong? What is my purpose? What happens next?
Other days On the outside Wonder abounds- Light-lined clouds Rumbling rolls of thunder The rhythm of the rain- Offering answers- Right where you are Exactly what you’re doing One day at a time
Confident answers That blanket the Cares of adulthood In warm affection Leaving behind Newfound freedom And transformation- Clouds become smiles Thunder-outstretched hands Rain-an arm around a shoulder
I suppose that child Will always be there Some days filled With questions Other days listening For answers that Continually fill with Only one purpose- To be spilled right Back out again
We recently experienced some cooler summer temperatures, rare for Oklahoma in August. Beautiful mornings, perfect for sitting outside with a cup of coffee.
One of those mornings, I did just that-reading, listening to the birds, enjoying a few relaxing moments. And then it happened-a sweet little hummingbird flew up to our empty feeder.
Our other bird feeders have attracted a lot of visitors. I hear them chirping and see them fluttering in the yard multiple times during the day. But our hummingbird feeder? There were no visitors all summer long. The sweet nectar served mostly as food for the ants and liquid for the sun to evaporate.
Since there had been no visitors, it had not been refilled. Sadly, I watched the hummingbird quickly flit away. Needless to say, I quickly refilled the feeder. Was it too late? I didn’t know, but I certainly hoped.
Several days later, I noticed several hummingbirds coming to the feeder! I was so excited! They perched in our trees, and one even landed on a string of outside lights.
Not only were they fun to watch, but their strength also provided a reminder when the storms came a few days later. ❤
Flashes of lightning Crashing thunder And howling winds Disrupted any Possibility for sleep Morning remained dark As the rain poured Down from clouds- Sunshine began to Light the day While silent Remnants of The evening’s Storm hid In the breeze – Hummingbirds flitted Stopping briefly for Sips of nectar- One perched in A nearby tree Its tiny feet gripping A skinny branch As the leaf-covered Limbs swayed Back and forth- This little miracle Held firm and steady While my tired heart Watched in wonder Listening to its message- When the winds Are tossing you Back and forth Just remember- Keep holding on
These are difficult days. So many questions, so much confusion, so many tears. Yesterday’s rain reminded me that we have hope. And though there are more hard days ahead, we cannot give up. We must come together, lift each other up, and continue on…one step and a time. ❤
Raindrops teased All morning long Falling a few At a time With quiet Drip-drops Barely enough To dampen my hair By late afternoon The sky grew dark- No longer playing Their little game, The frightened raindrops Huddled together Creating steady streams Flowing down from Cloud to ground- Proving there is Strength in numbers, The brave raindrops Transformed themselves Into a wall of water Like a transparent curtain Hanging from the sky- Suddenly, the curtain fell No longer flowing From cloud to sky Now a blanket of water Flowing downward Across the landscape Carrying away All the sorrows Of the day- And the sun began to shine.
“Have You Ever Seen the Rain” Kelley Morris, piano
The past few mornings have been rainy. It’s difficult to wake up and get moving when the sky is so gray. But yesterday morning, though rain still fell, had a different appearance.
Looking outside, I noticed the sky looked strange. The view out the back door was still mostly gray, but with an odd hint of pink. Looking out the front window showed the sun trying to shine through the rain. My first thought-I bet there is a rainbow.
So, I walked outside, and sure enough, there it was, a beautiful rainbow, the full arch, from one corner of the sky to the next. Little drops of rain fell on me as I took in its beauty. And then, of course, I had to snap a few pictures.
My eyes saw each color of the rainbow. Clear and bright. But when I looked at my photo, something was wrong. Still beautiful, but the colors seemed muted. Not what my mind remembered from just a few moments earlier.
I immediately began to edit my photo. Don’t you love those filters? But this took a lot of adjustments. I played with light, contrast, shadow, etc. Finally, I had a picture that represented what I had witnessed.
Why was it so important for me to change the original picture? Seeing that rainbow brought a moment of beauty and peace during difficult days. And by sharing my photo, I hoped to share that experience. Maybe someone else needed that same kind of moment.
Which photo best represents what I actually saw? In my mind, it is the second. But logically, I know it is probably something in between the two. Maybe the second one is more representative of how I felt. Either way, that’s the way I saw it. And I think there’s a lesson in there somewhere… 🙂
Some days the Weight of worry Presses me down And I am left crawling Among the shadows Hands and knees Scraping the ground Head low, feeling Afraid and alone Standing up On my own Is impossible-Yet, A flicker of hope Reminds me that I am not alone Like a child reaching For their parent I glance up as His hands reach down Lifting me out Of the shadows Gently placing me Among the light Of the stars A time to rest Preparation for The day when I will once again Be found crawling Among the shadows- This is the journey– To be traveled with One lasting truth- Wherever the road leads I will never be Out of reach
“Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.”