I often get frustrated
with my own. The way
they become jumbled,
like a bowl of alphabet soup.
Isolated letters are visible
But I feel lost as to
how they fit together.
Other times, my thoughts
become frantic, building
one upon another.
A growing snowball of worries
rapidly rolling down a hill-
Ignoring my calls to stop.
But, is there such a thing as better thoughts?
I suppose not. After all, my thoughts
belong only to me.
And now and then,
in the middle of the chaos,
I take a deep breath and
clearly hear one thought
above the rest-You are enough
Tag: anxiety
Renewal
A swath of deep, dark
purple appeared, the
top layer of sunrise,
oranges and golds
rising underneath.
The horizon, their
steady starting line.
The nearby Morning Star
inscribed words of comfort
in silver lettering across the layers.
Here I am. You are not alone.
Words I have received,
written down, and shared
on many occasions.
But today, for a moment,
It felt as though I was
receiving them for the first time.
Why these words this morning?
Perhaps to reinforce a truth
experienced in recent days
as a renewed promise.
Even when all is not well,
You will be okay
Enjoying a few days in Chicago. My first visit! Grateful for time away with the guy pictured below. 😘
Tell Someone
A tightening in the
center of my chest
A knot in my gut
Breathe
A few moments of relief
And then with no warning
A tightening in the
center of my chest
A knot in my gut-
Add in a little race
between my pulse
and my thoughts-
Breathe deeper
Take a drink of water
Tell someone how I’m feeling
The cycle may continue
a little longer
but I’m no longer
circling it alone
I often speak of writing as a type of therapy. I’m able to get feelings on paper without speaking the words.
I have not written about anxiety and depression in a while. But today was tough. Anxiety was knocking down the door.
If you happen to also be there, you are not alone.
Much love,
Kelley
Simply Sunday
Pulseline
Sometimes, relief for
anxious hearts is held
in surprising places
Have you ever sat
in a chair beside
the hospital bed of
someone you love?
The steady beep
of a heart monitor
mapping the tempo
of each precious breath
The gentle curves
of a stable pulse line
repeated over and over
reporting all is well
Peace surfaces alongside fear
I have experienced
this peace at other
times, in other places
A morning row of clouds,
their gentle undulation
performing a steady beat
underneath the warmth
of a brilliant sunrise
A skyline of treetops
grown together through
storms, their silhouette
a uniform motif of peace
painted across the horizon
Sometimes, relief for
anxious hearts is held
in surprising places
Peace surfaces alongside fear
Spacious
Sometimes my brain
feels overcrowded.
Like, there’s not enough space
for all my thoughts to process.
Then one word emerges
from the muck.
Spaciousness.
My busy thoughts pause-
It does exist.
Spaciousness.
Between the time you were born
and the person you’ve become.
Between the first dark cloud
of a storm and the last drop of rain.
Between each breath I take,
as I slow down to watch
clouds gracefully float past.
Counterintuitive
Not a cloud in the sky.
Yet, a heavy haze
held the morning.
Unhelpful. Especially when
my brain also feels foggy.
If only I were still sleeping.
However, sleep is not
a likely solution.
There is rarely a
single solution anyway.
Some days are just like this.
My heart is grateful for
family and friends.
My head is unsure how
to process the melancholy.
Seems counterintuitive
to wish for a cloud.
But if a fluffy cloud means
A lifted haze
A bluer sky
A spark of imagination
Then I will keep searching.
Looking out every time
I pass a window.
Simply Sunday
A Lesson in Comparison
I have never seen
a blue so pale, barely blue.
Blurring the lines
between sky and cloud.
Still blue, only subdued.
The mood emanating from
those muted hues
is quite opposite from
this morning’s bird songs.
Playful conversations
I could only observe,
no matter how closely
I listened. Smile-inducing,
even without understanding.
Perhaps there’s a lesson
in the comparison.
Pale blue-an accurate description
of my current mood.
Playful conversations-an indication
of future possibilities.
An intriguing coexistence.
Whispering Blue
A little patch of pale blue
Whispered my name
After the storm.
Rain had fallen
So hard, the sky was
No longer visible.
I could barely see
The road in front of me.
My shoulders tensed.
My chest tightened.
My heart grew heavy.
As the storm passed,
My body relaxed, tired.
But the heaviness
In my heart remained.
Even the little patch of blue
Couldn’t lighten the weight.
But that’s okay.
That wasn’t its purpose.
The little patch of blue
Whispered my name to
Shift my gaze and remind me-
Look for the good.
Trust that the storm will pass.
Carried Home
White and whispy
They floated upward
From the horizon
Into the wide blue-
Like doves, with wings
Spread wide
Their numbers,
Infinite –
The worries holding my heart
Began to fade-
Not entirely disappearing
But loosening their grip-
It’s funny how peace
Occupies the most
Curious spaces
And requires
Only a small
Measure of time
Before offering relief-
I may have been driving my car
But it was the clouds
That carried me home
A Calling
The voice in my head screams
As the one in my heart sobs
A flood of questions
Fills the gulf in between-
Unable to understand
Darkness capable of
Instantly turning
One heart against another
With no consideration of
The humanity within us all
Instead, focused on labels
Created, then vilified by men-
My head barely remains above
This continuous current of Information-
My heart aches for a sign of hope-
Sunlight after a storm
Twinkling star in the night sky
Laughter of a child-
The beginnings of truth
A calling for peace
Piano Girl 