Ready or not, here they come!

There are exactly ten days left until the start of school.  My fellow teachers and I are busy bees, frantically working to prepare our classrooms.  Searching for just the right bulletin board border, inspiring posters, room arrangement, etc.  Even though the decorations are not the most important aspect of this process, I do want my room to be warm and inviting.  A place students look forward to visiting which encourages them to be creative.  Since I spend most of my days in this space, the atmosphere is also important for my personal well-being.

This year begins my tenth year as a public school teacher, first a special education teacher and currently an elementary music teacher.  The ten-year mark has me thinking more closely about my focus as a teacher.  Why am I doing this?  What would I like to accomplish?  How long will I stay in this position?  Maybe my questions have something to do with turning fifty this past year…who knows?

I have chosen the word connections to guide my attitude for the coming school year.  After all, the success of the year is dependent on positive relationships with both colleagues and students.  Fellow teachers, no matter their age or level of experience, have something to offer.  A fresh idea, a long-tested method, contagious energy-discovered only when we take the time to get to know each other, listening and investing time-connecting.

And what about my students?  Why are connections so crucial?  Because music is personal.  Styles are endless, and we all have our likes and dislikes, especially kids.  Unless I take the time to get to know my students and let them get to know me, how can I expect them to explore and create?  Yes, they may learn basic music skills, building blocks, history.  However, unless they make a personal connection and recognize that music is all around them, I haven’t done my job.

This is not an easy task.  As the music teacher, I see between 400-500 students.  That’s a lot of names!  And I struggle with remembering names in general.  So that’s where we begin-movement and rhythm games, not only sharing our names and our favorite (fill in the blank) but hearing them repeated back to us.  Simple I know-but surprisingly empowering.  When students realize another person likes the same color, animal, food, song-a connection is made.  A first step…

Those first days back are exhausting!  It’s easy to become overwhelmed (and a tiny bit irritable) with the newness.  Adjusting all over again to the daily schedule and expectations.  This year I want to push past all that and see the people in front of me, colleagues and students.  I hope connections are made that very first week.  Connections which will become building blocks, and grow into an amazing, music-filled school year!

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What’s in a Name?

Names are significant, the first thing to define us as a person. Expectant parents spend much time choosing just the right one. They may choose the name of a relative or close friend.  A name’s meaning may also play a role in their decision making.  No matter their reasoning, the label is given.  And once you have that name, you have an identity…and a way for people to quickly get your attention.

Take for example my husband, Gart.  No, there’s not supposed to be an “h” on the end. And yes, I’m sure his name is not Gary.  He was named after his great grandfather-although there have been some family disagreements about whether the original name was Gart or Garth-but here we are.  He likes to joke about his name.  Things like–third grade was the worst year, that’s when kids learn to rhyme.  Or–trust me, you don’t want to play the name game with a name like Gart.

His name automatically brings a smile or a quizzical look when first heard.  Most people seem unsure.  As if they’re thinking,  “Did I hear that correctly?” or “Do you realize what that rhymes with?”  The answer to both is, “Yes!”  It is an unusual name, requiring a strong personality.  And adding his sense of humor to that strength creates an amazing combination.

From the time we met, Gart has always had the ability to make me laugh.  I remember early in our relationship one particular evening hanging out with friends.  Someone said, “Hey, Gart—tell us that story again about when you were caught in a tornado!”  Well, next thing you know everyone in the room was seated on the floor in front of him, intently listening to his crazy story.  And soon, we were all rolling on the floor, laughing uncontrollably.  It was as if they were hearing this tale for the first time.

After twenty-five years of marriage, he still makes me laugh—almost on a daily basis.  Not that there haven’t been tears, just ask anyone who knows me.  But it is humor that has kept our relationship strong.  Choosing laughter has helped us through some difficult, stressful situations.  And thankfully his sense of humor has been passed on to our children.  They each show it in their own unique way, but its presence is undeniable.

It makes me wonder.  How did growing up with the name Gart affect the person he is today?  Would his personality be the same if his name had been Gary or Garth?  Silly questions I’m sure.  The important thing is I love him and I love his name.  Truth is, it fits him perfectly.

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Wandering Spirit

When my children were younger, they had the opportunity to participate in an opera scenes production at the University of Tulsa. I was working there as a staff accompanist at that time and we needed “three spirits” for our production of Mozart’s Magic Flute. Well, it was quite an experience.  Our oldest son Robert followed directions perfectly, as did our daughter Rachel.  But we couldn’t help chuckling as Rachel kept our youngest, Ryan, in line.  Invariably he would stray from their practiced path, and little mama Rachel would gently guide him back.  As a result, Ryan was nicknamed the “wandering spirit.”

I think about that often, as he is now a 6’3, 17-year-old senior in high school.  Others in our family often refer to Ryan as a free spirit. He is our artist, always imaginative, his mind always moving full speed ahead with constant ideas and images.  I love viewing and sharing his work and look forward to seeing where life takes him.

There was a time, however, when I’m not sure we did our best to encourage that creativity.  Ryan was that kid in school teachers often thought was not paying attention. “Easily distracted in class” was a common conference theme.  His backpack was always filled with drawings, on whatever paper he could find.  Art covered homework, though most of the time completed, was not always turned in.  Many clean-out sessions and lectures were held at the kitchen table.

I remember saying things like, “You have to stop drawing all the time at school! You’ve got to focus on your work!”  We were trying to be good parents, making sure his grades matched his ability.  After all, grades would help with college.  Of course, we had no idea what he might do in the future, but we wanted to help him be prepared. We pushed him to work harder, and the early high school years were a challenge.  Of course Ryan, in his “wandering spirit” way didn’t seem to be concerned.

All children are different.  Each with their own interests and personality which need to be cultivated.  As educators, my husband and I would both readily agree.  But as parents, it’s not always easy to apply that knowledge when it comes to our own children.  For our first two children, school work wasn’t an issue.  Of course, they were not perfect but did learn how to “do school” early on.  Very few reminders were needed. Ryan was another story.  Don’t get me wrong, he was not rebellious or a bad student.  He just had his own way of doing things and needed a little extra guidance.

His junior year of high school, it was like a light switch flipped.  The previous summer he had been doing a lot of drawing.  We had gotten him a digital drawing tablet to connect to his laptop, and he asked to take a summer art class.  He also received some animation software as a gift from his brother.  Now we were encouraging his true passion.  Those experiences along with helping him create a class schedule which included some virtual hours gave Ryan the freedom he needed for success.  It was his best school year yet!

This current summer he is once again taking an art class.  The time and effort he spends on his artwork continue to increase.  His creativity amazes me.  I’m so proud of him and his commitment to his work.  As we approach his senior year of high school, there is no question where his interests lie, and it is exciting to hear him talk about studying animation after graduation.  I’m thankful that we did not miss the chance to encourage Ryan’s imagination.

It is tempting to think our children should fit into a perfect mold like little soldiers always walking a straight line.  What a boring world that would make!  Yes, there is a need for discipline and structure. Just not at the expense of creativity and purpose.

I want my “wandering spirit” to continue traveling his own path. He is very comfortable in his own skin, and I never want that to change. No matter how far his wanderings may take him, I hope he finds time to make his way back home.  And never forgets how much we love him—exactly the way he is.

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Check out more of his work on Instagram–numbskull19

 

A Tree’s Tale

Lovely green accessories
My very own leaves
Identify my type
For all to perceive

Tower above creatures
Though exterior rough
Provide shaded protection
Surprisingly enough

Trunk filled with rings
Showing age with grace
Roots are established
Securing my space

Name may be Pine or Palm-                                                                                                   Mimosa, Aspen, or Oak
No matter–my witty narration
Fond memories and laughter evoke

 

 

Ocean

Hidden world of motion

Under smooth layer of blue

Whose creatures won’t survive

Outside the aqua hue

Nor can humans endure

Life in this blue domain

Inventions help us visit

Won’t allow us to remain

World below the waves

Separate from that above

Yet each sustains the other

Dive into this deep with love

Cousin Truths

Twenty-four!  That’s how many first cousins I have on my mom’s side of the family.  With twenty-four cousins, there was always somebody ready to play.  Kickball, basketball, riding bikes, king-of-the-hill on grandma’s front porch-never an excuse for boredom!

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As much as we loved playing together, we were not always nice to each other. One particular story comes to mind.  I was spending the night at Aunt Mary’s house.  She had six girls but was always willing to add one more.  Her oldest daughter, Rebecca, was born twenty days after me, and we were always close growing up.  One of us could be pretty bossy-not saying which one…

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We loved to play pretend.  This particular day we were playing house. Rebecca and I were the moms, the younger sisters divided between us as our kids.  A make-believe phone call was made, an invitation to visit offered, with only one condition.  Barbara could tag along, but not Janice-she would have to stay home.  In other words, we didn’t want to play with Janice.  The youngest of our pretend family, we decided she was too little to play.

Well, Aunt Mary got wind of our little plan, as usual.  She sat us down for a chat.  “Girls, imagine if I invited your Aunt Geneva over for coffee, and told her to bring Aunt Martha, but not Aunt Linda (her youngest sister).  How do you think that would make your Aunt Linda feel?”  Of course, that would not be nice, and sounded completely ridiculous!  We got the message.

I know it sounds simple, but sometimes simple is exactly what we need.  Gentle reminders, for both children and adults, encouraging us to walk in another’s shoes. Remembering our actions are capable of greatly impacting the feelings of others.

At that moment, Aunt Mary could have simply given us a consequence or made us go play outside.  After all, there were seven girls playing inside the house!  Instead, she chose to be calm and thoughtful in her response, giving us a real-life situation we could easily understand-and would never forget.

Thankful for cousin memories and the wisdom of simple truths.

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Small Gesture, Great Meaning

THE CAMPERS ARE COMING!

For their 6th summer, Champions Special Ministries have literally been rolling out the red carpet for their campers. This organization provides summer camps for individuals with special needs.  Campers are paired with a coach for the whole week. Their coach is with them all day, each day making sure they have the best possible camp experience.

My daughter Rachel and her friend Ariel have been coach and camper together now for 5 years.  They were also friends in high school where Rachel worked as a peer tutor.  Their friendship is special.  And though Ariel may not express herself the same way Rachel does, their bond is unmistakable.

Today I stopped by the camp for a quick visit.  I saw these two sweet friends sitting at the back of the room, participating in whatever ways Ariel found comfortable.  Rachel got up so I could sit down and talk to Ariel.  She wasn’t too sure about Rachel moving but looked me directly in the eyes as I greeted her and decided it was ok.  Communication is challenging for Ariel but you can see her mind actively working, desiring to respond.

I sat down in the chair to her left, turning towards her.  As I was talking about how good it was to see her at camp with Rachel, she gently reached for my left arm, pulling my hand around to her shoulder.  I wrapped my other arm around her back and just hugged her for several minutes.

She was soon ready for Rachel to retake her seat. Back to the comfortable friendship they share.  For a few brief moments, Ariel allowed me to also be part of her space.  That small gesture-moving my hand to her shoulder-had enormous meaning.

I’m so glad I didn’t miss it.

Find out more about Champions at http://www.championsspecialministries.org

 

Creative Spark

My creative life used to be filled with musical collaborations. While working toward my bachelor’s degree in piano performance, I spent many hours accompanying voice lessons and ensembles.  Playing the piano was my life, but I increasingly began to enjoy working with other musicians.

Those experiences influenced my plans for grad school.  My master’s degree work consisted of constant collaboration with other musicians.  Preparation for recitals with vocalists, brass players, and string players filled my days and nights. Yes, it was challenging. Yes, it was exhausting. But oh was it rewarding!

In my professional life, I’ve also had those satisfying musical moments.  Working as a university staff accompanist, faculty recitals, choral accompanying, opera workshops, etc. continued to keep my creative juices flowing.

Although music continued to be part of my life,  I eventually stepped away from it as my main profession.  Don’t get me wrong, I have no regrets.  My life has been full.  I spent nine precious years as a stay-at-home mom, worked as a special education teacher, and currently, I’m an elementary music teacher.

It has been a long time, a hot minute, as they say these days since I’ve played professionally.  Today I suddenly realized that a part of me has missed it.

I’m in my final week as a rehearsal pianist for the Rose Rock Opera Institute.  It has been a great experience, working with talented young singers and amazing teachers.  One lesson today was extra special.  The music placed in front of me was familiar.  I had played it years before.  Beautiful melodies weaving between voice and piano.

But then I saw those spots.  You know the ones.  The ones that gave me trouble years earlier.  And that fear of making mistakes started to creep in.  Thankfully the teacher had given me and the student a specific spot in the music to place our focus.  We repeated one small, beautiful phrase about ten times before performing the entire piece one final time.  It was amazing.  We listened to each other’s parts, attempting perfect balance.

Was it exhausting? Yes! My brain was in high gear.  Thinking hard about the line, voicing, surprising harmonies-working together to bring a piece of music to life.  And just as this talented young student decided to take a chance, I did the same.  Focused on making music instead of worrying about the wrong notes.

Today a creative spark was reignited.  And for that, I am thankful.

Twenty-One Today

Twenty-one today, how can that be?

Seems only yesterday, you were just three

Bossy at times, so sassy and sweet

A perfect description, your Dad would agree

 

Today all grown up-compassionate and strong

Advocating for special needs, desiring all to belong

Embracing the future, choosing hope in the world you see

A beautiful young woman standing in front of me

 

Today I remember your blue eyes and curls

Treasuring sweet times with my sassy little girl

Remembering the past but not lingering too long

Learning from you what it means to be strong

 

Letting go while holding on is where I find myself

Cherishing the pictures which sit on my shelf

So thankful I’m your mom and you’re my sweet girl

Happy Birthday, Dear Rachel!  Today is all yours!